To Xia Xia

Chapter 59

A cell phone ring broke the silence of the morning.

Li Jiashu turned over. The hangover gave him a severe headache. He fumbled around looking for his phone on the bed. He couldn't find the phone, but he found a hairy head.He opened his eyes a little, and when he turned his head, he saw Bai Xia who was fast asleep.His brows were still slightly furrowed, as if a little uncomfortable.

The scenes that happened last night appeared in front of Li Jiashu one by one.

He hadn't forgotten, of course he hadn't.

But... Li Jiashu patted his head in frustration.Although this cannot be regarded as drunken sex, everything is different from what he expected.Bai Xia...but his own brother!

The phone rang suddenly again, in the pocket of his jacket, he was lying quietly on the ground with other clothes, including his and Bai Xia's, with a few drops of dry milky white liquid on it.

Li Jiashu acted like he hadn't woken up, he was in a daze for a long time, until the phone stopped ringing by itself, he still stared at Bai Xia in a daze.The other party was rubbing his arm, and seemed to be disturbed by the annoying ringtone, and rubbed his eyes dissatisfied.

It is said that people make mistakes after drinking, so how should he face Bai Xia now?

Li Jiashu scratched his hair sleeping like a chicken coop irritably, got off the bed lightly, wrapped his nightgown around his body, and then put a pile of messy clothes on the stool to make the room look less... .promiscuous.

Afraid of waking Bai Xia up, he took his mobile phone to the living room to answer the call.As soon as the door opened, Dongdong was squatting at the door, staring at Yuan Gulu's eyes and meowing at him aggrievedly.Only then did Li Jiashu remember that he forgot to feed her cat food last night. Well, to be precise, he forgot the existence of this cat.

As soon as Li Jiashu opened the door, Dongdong rushed into the bedroom with a meow, and jumped onto the bed with ease.Li Jiashu was not in the mood to care about her, because the phone in his hand vibrated again, this time it was a text message.It was from Chang Keming, so he woke up and called back quickly.

After calling his agent back, Li Jiashu realized that he was on the news again, which of course was not good news.

"I won't say anything about you when you're drinking. I'm afraid there is no one else who can make such a big news out of drinking!" Chang Keming spoke with emotion, obviously in an extremely bad mood, "Who is that person? Don't talk to me. I said it was your brother."

Chang Keming was talking about Bai Xia. Last night when Bai Xia sent him home, he was photographed. It was nothing. The photos were all taken secretly from behind, and the two were not too intimate. The problem is, isn't this The two of them were photographed for the first time, and the paparazzi also posted photos and videos of the two of them going home and going out together.

The name of the news is also very attractive.

"A rising star in the music industry gets drunk late at night, suspected of cohabiting with homosexuals."

"Heterosexual? Homosexual? The popular male singer is suspected of being in two boats."

"Abandoning Xiaohuadan's girlfriend, is it for true love or profit?"

......

Li Jiashu almost laughed. Fortunately, several photos were taken at night, so he couldn't see Bai Xia clearly. He was an outsider and the media didn't know him, but Li Jiashu still felt a little guilty because he didn't protect Bai Xia. good.

"He's really my brother..." Li Jiashu said slowly after a long time, brother or lover, this choice is too difficult for him, and he can't have both.But maybe in front of the public, the identity of the younger brother is acceptable.

"The public relations article has been written." Chang Keming saw that he was silent for a while, and felt a little uncertain. She had never heard Li Jiashu mention this person, but she still had the calmness of an agent in her body, "True or not? It's important to make others believe it's fake!"

These words obviously did not believe him, Li Jiashu felt very uncomfortable, he was panicked, so blocked that he almost couldn't breathe.

Chang Keming continued: "I asked people to cancel all the unimportant activities before your concert. You should stay at home during this period, and if there are negative news, no one can protect you!"

"understood."

Li Jiashu hung up the phone, Bai Xia had already woken up, standing in the living room he could hear Bai Xia and Dongdong talking softly, his footsteps froze for a moment, he didn't know how to get in.

He has been waiting for himself to become strong enough to protect the one he loves, but he found that the more famous a person is, the more timid he is, and he dares not do anything.Ordinary people who do wrong things are still ordinary people, saints who do wrong things are sinners.The more famous a person is, the more he can only live in his own world as big as a snail shell. No matter how beautiful and attractive the outside world is, it has nothing to do with you.

Until now, he didn't even dare to admit that Bai Xia was his lover.

Said to protect him?

Li Jiashu went to the kitchen to warm up a cup of milk, and walked into the bedroom with it. Bai Xia was teasing Dongdong, having a great time playing with her, her eyes bent into a bridge, and when she saw him coming in, she held Dongdong's little paw and said to him : "Say hello to brother~"

Dongdong lived up to everyone's expectations and "meowed" twice, jumped off the bed and rubbed against Li Jiashu's trouser legs to curry favor with him.Li Jiashu handed the milk to Bai Xia. When he got up, the quilt slid off, revealing half of his body, which was covered with hickey marks left by Li Jiashu last night.Bai Xia didn't pay attention, and took the milk with a smile and gulped it down. Li Jiashu touched his fingertips and ran away in a hurry, "I... go and feed Dongdong cat food."

Bai Xia didn't notice his abnormality, he was only immersed in a better thing.Although my whole body is sore now, as if the frame has been disintegrated and reassembled, the secret place is also swollen and painful, and my stomach is still a little uncomfortable, but these are not important.He put down the cup with one hand, and supported his sore waist with the other. He still clearly remembered that Li Jiashu penetrated him relentlessly and whispered in his ear that he loved him. Bai Xia blushed when he thought of it.

They belong to each other, and to each other only.

It was rare for Bai Xia to stay in bed, and picked up her mobile phone from the ground to ask for leave from the teacher, lying under the quilt with only half of her head exposed, her two feet rubbing against each other under the quilt.Li Jiashu came in and brought him clean clothes. Seeing that there were still milk stains around his mouth, he took a piece of paper from the bedside and handed it to him.

He is a little confused now, in various senses. He hasn't digested Li Qinsheng's words, and what happened last night. Make everything mess up.Of course he likes Bai Xia, it's just that he needs time to digest the whole thing and balance everyone's relationship, including his family, Bai Xia, and himself.

Bai Xia didn't know what he was thinking, instead of taking the tissue in his hand, she got up and kissed the corner of his mouth playfully.But Li Jiashu's reaction made him stunned. Not only did Li Jiashu not respond, but he turned his head slightly to avoid it.

Bai Xia's heart suddenly became extremely cold, and the hand hooking his shoulder stopped in mid-air. This... what does it mean?

"I... drank a little too much last night... I'm sorry..." Li Jiashu seemed to be sincerely apologizing, but also seemed to be making excuses for what happened last night.

"I already know...our relationship..." Li Jiashu felt that he was cruel, like an executioner, but he had to give himself time to figure it out, and he was also responsible for Bai Xia, "I think I...need time...to accept..."

Bai Xia withdrew her hand from him. If it was just cold hearted just now, this time it fell into the ice cellar. Li Jiashu... already knew that. Know, at least that way he can fool himself and stay with him for a few more years.No, even a few days is fine.

So, what does Li Jiashu mean now?

What would he think of himself?

Does he feel that he has no integrity at all and can sleep with his own brother?

Bai Xia put clothes on himself almost in a panic, his whole body was trembling, completely different from last night's trembling, he bit his lip and didn't calm down a bit.He didn't wear the suit that Li Jiashu gave him, but picked up a dirty one, which still smelled of alcohol and lewdness, as if it was telling a wrong story.

Up to now, his body is still weak, and his legs trembled when he stood up, and he almost failed to stand still.

Li Jiashu remained silent by the side, and Dongdong came in lazily stretching his neck after eating the cat food, not paying attention to the frozen air at all, unconsciously wanting to play with Bai Xia.

Bai Xia felt uncomfortable, and completely lost the mood to play with her just now. She just picked her up and walked towards the door with her sore body.

Li Jiashu felt that he was a heinous bastard, how could he say such things to Bai Xia at such a time, but the words were all out of his mouth, and he couldn't take them back...

But when Bai Xia left this door today, the two of them were really finished.

"Bai Xia!" As if he had come to his senses, Li Jiashu held him back, "I..."

"Don't touch me!" As soon as he opened his mouth, Dongdong was so frightened that he jumped off him and ran out, not daring to come in at the door.Only then did Li Jiashu realize that his face was covered with tears. Bai Xia shook off Li Jiashu's hand that was holding his arm, "Don't you need time? I'll give you..."

He didn't want to cry so ugly in front of Li Jiashu, but the tears kept flowing down in disobedience, and the words choked in his throat after that, and he didn't say it.Li Jiashu will give whatever he wants, as long as he can give it.

Now that Li Jiashu wants to think for himself, all he can offer is to leave.

But what did Li Jiashu think about it?What if he really doesn't want himself?What else can he give him?

He has given all of himself...

Bai Xia has never felt that he is so cheap, he never knows what life is, and his life has always revolved around Li Jiashu.When Li Jiashu gave him a candy when he was a child, he could follow him for several days. Li Jiashu couldn't even scold him. When he was in high school, for Li Jiashu's career, he was almost raped by Ji Qing. He didn't dare to say a word, but Li Jiashu He even told himself that he signed the company on the last day before leaving.Later, Li Jiashu broke up with him for his own future, but he was still cheeky and reluctant to leave. He hadn't known him for so many years, and stayed by his side like a little lover, watching him have an affair with others, for half a month I am happy to make a phone call with myself.Ji Qing threatened him, and he didn't dare to call the police because of Li Jiashu. Li Jiashu forced him, causing him so much pain that he almost died of pain. He knelt down and apologized, and his heart softened, and he stuck it on like a dog's skin plaster... ..he has always been thrown around like an object, sacrificing himself, without the right to choose, because the right to choose has always been in Li Jiashu's hands.When did his precious love become so cheap?Or did he always love so cheaply from the beginning?It was so cheap that Li Jiashu believed him when he said casually that he liked him.

It was not easy for him to have the courage to give up the eyes of the world. He was not afraid of them criticizing and spurning him. What he was afraid of was Li Jiashu not wanting him... Bai Xia knew that their relationship was difficult to accept, Li Jiashu It takes time, so why did he do that to himself last night?Still say you love yourself?

He was clearly awake at the time.

Or did he regret it when he woke up today, or did he just want to see how shameless his little brother could be?

Li Jiashu stubbornly grabbed Bai Xia's arm and refused to let him go, the two were at a stalemate, why did he do this?Bai Xia thought.

Bai Xia's cell phone vibrated in his pocket, and he took out Li Jiashu's hand again, thinking it was a text message, but he didn't expect it to be the special concern set on his Weibo.

There was only one person in it, which now looks like sarcasm.

There was already a lot of noise on the two of them's news microblogs, and Bai Xia didn't need to go out of his way to find out, so he automatically jumped in front of him. Compared to the most searched word coming out an hour ago, Li Jiashu is now the most searched word. Company statement.

Although that Weibo post was not posted by Li Jiashu, it actually represented his position.

"The boy in the photo posted online is the younger brother of Mr. Li Jiashu, and has no other relationship. The relationship between Mr. Li Jiashu and his girlfriend is very stable. We will pursue legal responsibility for the false information circulating on the Internet."

Bai Xia laughed at herself, he was always the one who couldn't get on the stage.

"You've already made your decision, why are you lying to me..." Bai Xia waved the phone in front of him, the text on it was extremely dazzling.

Li Jiashu wanted to hug him, but was pushed away, almost at that moment he knew he was wrong, he regretted it, he shouldn't have said that to Bai Xia, he shouldn't have hurt him, he shouldn't have hesitated like a man .It doesn't matter what their original relationship is, what matters is that he loves Bai Xia!

"Don't look at it, it's all fake." Li Jiashu took out his mobile phone and turned off Weibo for him, and hugged him from behind stiffly, trying to save him.Bai Xia was really heartbroken, he couldn't believe it anymore, he didn't believe that Li Jiashu would choose him in the end, and he didn't believe that his heart full of holes could be put together again.

"Li Jiashu, do you know?" Bai Xia laughed, with tears still hanging on his face, with a kind of broken beauty, "I believe you love me, but you will never love me the most."

He was a little choked up, and wiped away his tears to make himself look less embarrassed, "To you, there are too many important things! Everything is more important than me, career is more important than me, future is more important than me, time More important than me, fans are more important than me, even your brother Ji Qing is more important than me. But what about me? There is nothing in my world, and now I don’t even have a family, only you... We've never been equal..."

"Of course you don't know." He recalled a past event and laughed at himself: "You don't know anything, because you don't believe it at all, you don't believe how much I like you, and you don't believe what I say, because you There is always someone who believes more than me..." He thought of the nightmare in his sophomore year, and Ji Qing's threats and harassment to him for so long, but now he is relieved, "In my sophomore year, I I was almost raped, but you said I was making trouble for no reason, I was so scared, so scared...I have been waiting for you at home for so long, but you refused to let you stay with me..."

"What did you say?!" Li Jiashu's strength in holding him suddenly increased, and his violent eyes were enough to kill a person, "When...when?"

Bai Xia didn't want to talk to him at all, he always remembered these things clearly, he remembered every detail of being with Li Jiashu, even though he knew that Li Jiashu had forgotten, it wasn't his fault, he was always so busy, he wanted to remember so many things...

"I can't even bear to be angry with you. My heart softened when you came to me. You said you were going to come to City B, and I could only watch you go. You didn't even discuss it with me... ..”

"Do you remember the only time we went on a trip?" In fact, it couldn't be called a trip at all, it was just a tour of the surrounding ancient towns, but Bai Xia would never forget it for the rest of his life, "Here, this ring." He took it out from his pocket The ring tied with a string is already old, and the silver is no longer shining. "Your ring is long gone, right? That's right, only I would keep it foolishly..."

Li Jiashu lowered his head guiltily, his ring really did not know where it fell, maybe it was accidentally lost when he moved, maybe it was...he has never cared as much as Bai Xia.

"I don't blame you at all, really." Bai Xia carefully put away the ring, even more careful than putting away a priceless jade, "I just blame myself, why do I like you so much..."

"Stop talking..." Li Jiashu couldn't listen anymore. He knew he was an asshole, but today he realized how much he was, and relied on Bai Xia's love for him to do whatever he wanted, "Baby, I know I was wrong...forgive me OK?"

Bai Xia shook his head, he didn't know at all, Li Jiashu was favored by so many people, he was the favorite of heaven, he really didn't know what it was like to love someone to the extreme, at least he didn't know it yet.

"Didn't you say that when I really don't like you, let me go?" Bai Xia stared at the floor with empty eyes, even shedding tears.

"Let me go...I really dare not like you anymore..."

How many times can a broken heart be mended again?

How smooth can a piece of wrinkled paper be unrolled?

When things happen, there will always be some traces left, every time, Bai Xia's heart becomes numb.Maybe he shouldn't have started this relationship with Li Jiashu in the first place. If he likes him, let him like him silently. Watching him flourish, watching him marry a wife and have children, is better than Li Jiashu easily abandoning him in the end Good to come.